Our exclusive survey reveals sibling crisis

Nearly 90% of people whose brothers or sisters have died say grieving siblings are forgotten about.

The UK’s only sibling specific bereavement charity, Sibling Support, asked 143 brothers and sisters from around the world about their experiences with grief ahead of International Siblings Day.

Nearly three quarters (74.1%) of them disagreed or strongly disagreed with the statement “I feel supported in my grief”. Whilst almost all (97.9%) respondents agreed or strongly agreed that more sibling specific grief support is needed.

Sibling Support was started by people whose brother or sister died in their childhood. The charity works with families, charities and professionals across the UK to provide help and advice to young people experiencing grief.

The charities founder, Callum Fairhurst, who was 12 when his 14-year-old brother died from cancer said: “For too long sibling grief has gone under the radar. A lack of research and sibling specific resources means that young people are failing to get the support and help they need. In 2021 more than 850 children (aged 1-15) died in England and Wales, and more than 2,300 infants died. Many of those have siblings.”

The charity also provides resources for hundreds to help with their grief and mental health. From specifically produced bereavement books (of which thousands have been given out in hospices, schools and other charities) to mindfulness boxes that encourage young people to stop internalising their feelings.

Animations, explaining key topics like what a funeral is, appear on the charities website alongside stories of people who have also experienced a sibling bereavement.

In recent weeks Sibling Support held an event at No.11 Downing Street to bring together young people, organisations, celebrities and health workers.

At the event was Spencer Matthews, from Made in Chelsea, whose brother died after climbing Mount Everest. He commented: “The evening was one of the most emotional events that I have attended. I lost my brother when he was a bit older and though difficult, I find that in some way I was fortunate that my brother experienced more than some of the other attendees who spoke tonight. Sibling Support is a wonderful charity which deserves all the support they can get and I was very happy to attend this evening”.

Support for children dealing with the loss of a sibling, families wishing to support children and resources for healthcare professionals and those in a care position can be found on the Sibling Support website where free resources, case studies and more information is available, or by emailing: hello@siblingsupport.co.uk.